May 26, 2000

Colleen Mackesey, RN, (below) an Anesthesia manager, spent 14 years of her life in fear. A survivor of domestic violence, Mackesey attributes her ability to break away from her former life to the help she received from MGH Police and Security and the Employee Assistance Program (EAP). Mackesey was featured in an April 16 Boston Globe article about employers helping employees with domestic violence issues.

Mackesey says that her husband verbally abused her and controlled her every move by instilling intense fear that he would kill her if she tried to leave. "He wouldn't even let me go buy groceries because that would mean I had to talk to someone else," says Mackesey. "He didn't want my two children and me to have anyone else to go to, and he isolated us from all friends and family. We also moved 14 times in 14 years. The only things stable in my life were my children and my job at the MGH." Mackesey's fear grew so intense that she walked around her house with a knife at all times, ready to defend herself.

Mackesey excelled at her job at the MGH, but she knew she couldn't continue to live in fear. She worried about losing her job because of the turmoil in her personal life. Still holding onto hope, Mackesey tried on several occasions to leave her husband, despite the fear that he would kill her and her children if they left.

She stashed clothes around the garage, waiting for the right moment when she could gather them and flee. There were times when she became so frightened by her husband that she felt the only way out would be to kill him. She eventually hired a lawyer who helped her to get a restraining order and had him removed from her home. Her lawyer also suggested that she speak with Bonnie Michelman, director of MGH Police and Security. As it turned out, this was the best advice she could have received.

"The MGH saved my life, literally," says Mackesey. "Bonnie Michelman and Ruth Zakarin, [LICSW, a domestic violence counselor in the EAP] assured me that I would not lose my job. John Daley of MGH Police and Security escorted me to court and helped me get the most effective type of restraining order. Officers from Police and Security came out to my house and did a security check. They knew how to maneuver through the system, and that is what saved me."

Eventually Mackesey's husband was sentenced to jail for violations of the restraining order. Although he is now out of jail and on probation, Mackesey and her children are getting their lives back together.

"I can't believe that after hiding the truth from people for so long, I am able to tell my story. There is a myth that this only happens to certain types of people, but I defy that myth and I want others to know that they are not alone," says Mackesey. She has continued to succeed in her career at the MGH and regularly visits the EAP for support. "He didn't get the best of me. I'm still breathing and I do not take that for granted," she says.